Yes, it has been awhile.
So I'm older now.
And little.
I nearly puked, but for 15 dollars it wasn't so bad.
No pictures though. What a shame.

I've been feeling a tad dramatic lately.
I don't know why.
Haven't been on stage.
But I want the spotlight to find be anyways.
I've been mixed up.
I've been having the days of my life, and I'm excited for the ones to come.
But at times, I could never run away far enough.
Poor little girl.
So sad. Because her life is just soooo terrible.
That's what I'm thinking.
You're not alone.
But am I?

I'm sorry I would have posted a long time ago, but it never loaded all the way before.
Oh well.
New song.

All Aside

When, my men?
A hundred times don't let me,
But what is one more day.
If then, my men.
Generations don't debt me,
Mothers understand pay.

Pay me back, again.
Pay back is a costly thing.
But the longest sentence
Is worth it to me.
Laugh while you can.
While your lungs are still empty.
I'll be laughing when
Uniforms are out to get me. [Chorus]

Back to the chapter,
I hope they catch me,
Because a mind like this
Can't be healthy.
Self awareness is easy to grasp
when both of your wrists are held by a clasp.
Rule braker, cylinder blocker.
I can't believe I just stopped her.
Risk taker, handy waver.
I can't believe I just saved her.

[Chorus]

Next to the page,
I hope they ask me.
Because questions like this
Seem so lovely.
Artificial forrests, 'tis the joy.
Under the wrapping is no real boy.
Rule breaker, cylinder blocker.
I can't believe I never stopped her.
Risk taker, handy waver.
I can't believe I never saved her.

And now, with all emotion aside...
Hungry and fat is what you are.
Don't beg for my mercy, I'm in his car.
Daddy dearest has not taught me
anything, anything, anything.
Weekend getaways last more than a day.
So get away, get away, get away from me.

Seriously, so not in the holiday mood.
Why?
Well, I kinda know I'm insane, and let me say, it's better kept a secret.
Ohh joy to the world.
Being crazy is joyful.
Truth be told, I'm lying.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NtIPmGwKlzo

But at least I'm not the only one that's a little abnormal.
Call it acting all you want, but if that's acting, I must be one hell of an actress.

I swear that song is fucking addicting.

It's so weird how five years ago seems like such a long time, but afraid the next four will go by too fast.
I'm terrified of getting old.
Of not having things be so simple.
Even though right now, it's simply unbearable.
But the (school) year is half over.
It went by way too fast.
And soon people will be gone.
Then more will leave.
One last cycle.
Then me.
Then what?
I hate being so open like this.
Stupid as it is, I like secrets, but I'm afraid I'm keeping too many.
There are so many things I want to tell certain, maybe all, people. What I really want to see, to do, to believe. What I really am, who I really want, who I really hate.
So am I going to write it right here?
No.
It will be on some piece of paper, along with the rest of my lyrics and rants that are silent.
And I do want to say it, trust me, but it will just stay on that paper. I'll most likely write it in my hell away from home, but if that is how it has to be, so be it.

Thanks for the CD Jon.

Ohh, how it's been so long...
I'm so sorry I've been gone.

I am so damn predictable.
*insert sad emotional face here*

Jingle bells.
Its coming up.
I've been shopping, and dropping.
And apparently I'm too scary to approach in Target, ahem... Raphael.
Been reading a lot. Go me.
And I have two essay before the break of winter.
Guys, I secretly don't mind if you shave your legs, but I could have never told him that.
I am NOT a sympathic person, and I hate it when people feel bad for me.
I'm not selfish, but I have plenty of problems of my own, I really don't need to hear you bitch about your less important ones.
If I can keep my problems to myself, I'm sure you can handle the task.
Go for it.


P.S.- My music  up there is probably one of the best songs to get stuck in your head. Something to be thankful for.
For once.

So now everyone thinks I skipped first period to go smoke.
Thanks a lot, Emma's mom.
Seriously, banging someone's window will wake them up.
Just for future reference.
But this morning, 5:30 seemed a bit unnatural.
Tyler, just so you know, you will NEVER have a secret.
You really need to start shredding your secrets.
Or burying them.
Or drowning them in a school sink.
Or burning them with my smokable objects.
Or keeping them in your own poorly trimmed head.
But at least your teacher liked it.
Savannah, you better not be lying.
If she's not, I'll tell you right now, you WILL be jealous.
Beware.
JON RAN OVER A SQUIRREL?
AND HE LIKED IT?
What will they think of next?

Tofurkey.
Call it what you will, but I liked it.
Be adventurous people, try it.
So Thanksgiving was alright
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Even though some of the people weren't.
Age will ruin me, I swear.
But at least there is something to be (un)thankful for.
I wrote something "meaningless" that has the potential to entertain you.
Have fun.

"Save Changes To An Explanation"  (WOAH A TITLE. GO INSANE... NOW)

Loops in my remarks... but I still need an answer.
And it's not my job to make me live.
We recycle the blood of dreamers... transfussion please.
My desires are my missing puzzle piece.

I never exclaim,
can you please explain?
My crowd can rock and drop
all they want.
But once you're out of my view,
I start new.

It's a nutty reaction... "Allergic" I said.
And it's my job to be by myself.
Sinfully strip this sholder weight... cut off my chords?
Given favors give you rewards.

Her broken lungs won't save me a life time.
Just end hers.
"She stopped at her first."
And that was her last.
There's nothing like the past.

I never exclaim,
can you please explain?
My crowd can rock and drop
all they want.
But once you're out of my view,
I start new.

Grades are nehh...
as if you care.
I can't tell time or keep track of it.
Sorry.
No, I don't have them; I let a hobo eat them.
Sorry.

Hey veterans.
I hope you had a great day.
But it was kinda weird having a day off in the middle of the week, but nice at the same time.
Ohh Monica, where did Madagascar take place?
HMMM... LEMME THINK.
"Well they never said!"
YEA, THEY KINDA DID.
Anyway...
I'm gonna see one of my favorite people in less than 48 hours.
And I know what I want signed. You'll be able to think of it if you think really hard.
(Psst... it's not just the tee-shirt.)
I can't wait.